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Letters for Wednesday, January 6, 2021

Reducing traffic creates a better experience

The argument against the visitor fee for parking made sense with respect to policing it, the cost of hiring someone to handle it, etc. Issuing it alone presents issues. But we do need to make it more expensive for visitors and not aim for the “bottom” feeder, low-end, bargain shoppers. If Walt Disney can do it, so can we. A few years back, Disney raised its entrance fees in order to reduce the number of people attending. It was deliberate to make a better experience for those who do attend.

We need to reduce the number of people who come here. We cannot just return to the way it was pre-pandemic: roads congested, beaches congested, and reduced consumer spending. And we know we need to make the experience better.

Having a parking fee is one way we can do that. A “sticker” or card to hang from the rear-view mirror could be purchased via the car-rental agencies. Add on another $10/day — or whatever — to the cost of renting a car. It IS the traffic that seems to be the grating edge for most of us. Residents could obtain a similar sticker with DMV registration — free of course. This would be easy to spot, and (require) occasional surveillance by the police or others for compliance.

How we go about educating tourists on topics such as why sunscreen is bad for the reefs, or why “aloha” is a culture and not just a way to say “hello” and “goodbye,” that’s a separate issue.

Let’s start with reducing cars on the road and cars at the beaches, and create a better experience for all even if it costs more.

Cheryl Ann Farrell, Koloa

Pandemic Pop Quiz #6

I am going to be good from now on and

1. Completely trust everything the mainstream media says.

2. Completely trust in vaccinations (even though there are reports of Bell’s Palsy as a side effect of the COVID-19 vaccine.)

3. Completely stop making fun of Dr. Anthony Fauci.

4. Completely trust the CDC.

5. All of the above.

6. None of the above.

When Dr. Anthony Fauci is in training

1. His thighs measure 28.5”.

2. His calves measure 20”.

3. His chest measures 57”.

4. Wait a minute! These are Arnold’s measurements in training! You said you were going to stop making fun of Dr. Fauci.

These two movies are like vaccinations because

1. “Rosemary’s Baby” is about Rosemary giving birth to the devil’s child.

2. “The Fly” is about a man morphing into a big fly after being bitten.

3. The COVID-19 vaccine is a dandy thing and millions of terrified people are lining up for it.

4. Wait a minute! You said you were going to be good and now look at what you are saying about vaccines.

The best meal you could eat for your immune system is

1. Prime rib, baked potato loaded with butter, bacon bits, sour cream, chives. Scallops in butter sauce. Chocolate mousse for dessert. Guilty yum.

2. Organic blueberry smoothie. Yum.

3. Coffee and sticky bun. Guilty yum.

4. Salad with kale, seaweed, shredded cabbage. Baked squash. Yum-ish.

5. Brown rice with tempeh and sea vegetables. Gak.

6. Diet is an individual matter. What is optimal for one person may not be optimal for another.

7. I am not going to answer any trick questions about diet.

Freemasons with borderline personality disorder

1. Control everything in secret, even the pandemic.

2. Have a secret club at Yale University.

3. Actually Facebook, Google, and Twitter control everything.

4. I thought you were going to be good and not float these wild ideas.

5. Ack.

Here are the correct answers: Up to you. I am taking the Fifth.

Molly Jones, Kealia
Source: The Garden Island

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